Every once in awhile I decide to do some housekeeping and clean out my text message inbox on my phone. So I pull up the menu and start checking off the "delete message boxes" then hit delete.
That's when I recently went into a sudden panic attack thinking I had deleted "all" my messages instead of the checked ones. Normally this wouldn't be such a drama queen moment for me except there are a few messages that I didn't want to erase.
You see the one's I didn't want to erase were the last one's I received from a friend before they died back in June. Since they were intubated and unable to talk, texting was the only form of communication before their death, one of the last texts came within hours of their death. Then of course the one that I was dreading coming from a family member only moments after they left this world.
For the life of me I can't understand why I feel this need to hang on to them. It's like if I erase them I will be erasing the memory of their friendship. I know they are just words on a screen, but I can't bring myself to erase them, at least not right now.
It's weird because every once in a while I get a text from that phone, his daughter inherited the phone and sometimes I think I'm getting text messages from the beyond, which kinda fucking freaks me at for a second. Needless to say I am sure someone else is getting a good chuckle out of it too. Oh and it ends up that I didn't actually delete the wanted texts, which just leaves me in the same predicament. Ughh sometimes I just think about stuff too much.